Date a scene from non-knightly times. Funny short scenes - funny ideas What made me think about the scene of a date
This miniature was invented by the participants of the STEM "Kucha-Mala" even before the creation of the KVN team "Guys from our yard". The main role was played by Yuri Yanchenko. The final version of the text was done by Alexander Mineev. The miniature will perfectly fit into a student or school concert.
Bench. GRANDMA sits on it and reads a newspaper. There is a clock above the bench. On them 17-00. A YOUNG MAN comes up with flowers.
GRANDMA: Date, or what?
YOUTH: Date!
GRANNY: (looking at watch) Well done, arrived on time. Minute to minute.
YOUTH: No, even earlier. We have a date at 18:00. And I arrived a little early. Suddenly, she will also come early.
GRANNY: A naive young freak.
YOUTH: Well, let him not come earlier. I'll wait here and think about it.
GRANDMA: Come on, come on, come on
YOUTH: Right now she is probably drinking tea, holding a cup with her graceful, slightly plump hand. With her snow-white teeth, she bites into a cookie, and begins to eat it ...
GRANDMA: And slurp!
YOUTH: No, what are you! She is cultural. And then she quickly gets up, goes to the mirror and powders her pretty nose...
GRANNY: With a wart!
YOUTH: What are you?! She doesn't have any warts. Having powdered her nose, she begins to paint her eyes, which glow like two suns, combs her hair ...
GRANDMA: And dandruff is coming!
YOUTH: She doesn’t have any dandruff! Her hair smells like lavender. Then, she puts on little shoes, and her feet...
GRANNY: Curves, I suppose?!
YOUTH: What are you up to! You haven't seen her! And anyway, who gave you the right to talk about her like that?! She is the best in the world!
GRANNY: Best of all, best of all... Wait here a couple of hours - you'll find out who gave me such a right.
An hour has passed. At 18:00 hours. A GIRL appears. He wants to approach the YOUTH, but the SECOND GRANDMA does not let her.
BABKA 2: Worth it? Waiting? Thinks about you.
GIRL: Well, I'll go.
GRANNY 2: Wait, honey! Girls must be late. He will think of you, he will love you more.
GIRL: Really?
BABKA 2: I swear on a discounted travel pass!
GIRL: Well, then I'll go to the store for now.
Another hour passed. It's already 19:00 on the clock
GRANNY: Here! Already 19-00. Where is your princess?
YOUTH: Probably, he is now sipping tea with his girlfriend, holding a liter mug with his thick hairy hand, sticking out his crooked little finger with a bitten nail! With all her twenty-three yellow teeth, she bites into a loaf of butter, and begins to chew it...
GRANDMA: And slurp!
YOUTH: Yes, yes! Slurp! Already crackling behind the ears! She champs, licking her thick lips! And then she waddles up, and, shuffling her slippers, trudges to the mirror. Powder your nose...
GRANNY: With a wart!
YOUTH: With a huge wart! Covers acne, although this makes them even more noticeable. Draws eyebrows that are not, and never will be. Combing his dirty, greasy hair...
GRANDMA: And dandruff is coming!
YOUTH: Snowfall! Then she sticks her paws into her trampled shoes, and her legs...
GRANNY: Curves, I suppose?!
GRANNY and YOUTH slap each other's hands in solidarity.
YOUTH: And I expect such a monster?!
A GIRL appears.
GIRL: Hi honey! How long have you been waiting for me?
YOUTH: A long time ago
GIRL: Probably thinking about me?
YOUTH: I thought!
GIRL: And what did you think?
YOUTH: You know! You know!!! I don't think I deserve you! (leaves)
GIRL: Yura! Yura! Where are you going?! Wait! Why?! (runs after him)
GRANNY 2 comes out. Approaches GRANNY.
GRANNY: Well, old one, how does it feel from the first time?!
GRANDMA 2: Fly away! I just feel like a witch!
GRANNY: So I didn’t lie to you that it’s cooler than watching “Let them talk” at home. Row here by five tomorrow!
Do you remember that in the middle of cold and snowy February there will be a warm and bright holiday - Valentine's Day! How are you preparing for this holiday? We offer you funny scenes for Valentine's Day about the lovers themselves. Put on this scene at school or any other place where your holiday will be. And then your guests will applaud you and laugh.
Kitchen. There is a table in the kitchen, a woman (daughter's mother) is sitting at the table. Near the table and near the mother, a young man (the young man of the mother's daughter) walks back and forth. He glances nervously at his watch, shaking his head all the time.
Mother:
Stop looming back and forth in front of me already! Stop looking at the clock all the time. You can count the time, you look at your watch every five seconds!
Young man:
It's just that your daughter and I agreed to go to the movies today. You know that today is Valentine's Day!
Mother:
I know, but what does this have to do with you and my daughter?
Young man:
How what? By the way, your daughter and I have been together for a year already! And we love each other!
Mother:
Yes, a whole year together! And then what? Are you going to live on one love?
Young man:
What else do we need?
Mother:
What more do you need? Much is needed! For example, you need an apartment, where to build your love. You need a car to carry your love to work and home, to the store and on other matters! You need money to buy an apartment and a car ...
Young man:
That is, you think that only those who have money have happiness and love?
Mother:
Well, not really, of course. But I have one example. Here is the boss of my daughter - this is the happiest person! And an apartment, and a car, and a cottage, and money, and ...
Young man:
Ah, you're on your way again! Again you put this as an example!
Mother:
By the way, I didn’t want to tell you, after all, such a holiday, but I will say that now my daughter is having dinner with her boss. He asked her out on a date and she agreed!
Young man:
How is it for dinner? But what about cinema?
Mother:
Ha, cinema! Cinema is your life if you are with my daughter! And here is a real, happy fairy tale. And fairy tales, if you don't know, have a happy ending!
The door opens and the daughter enters. She's a little drunk and staggers, laughs and hiccups.
Daughter:
Oh Dima! Hi, darling! And I got back a little late!
Mother:
And you could have stayed all night, mom let you go!
Young man:
What does delayed mean? Did you have dinner with your boss? Did you have a date?
Daughter:
No, what are you, what a date?! It's just my boss, he's such a lonely man! He asked me to sit with him for a while, I agreed. I can't tell him no!
Mother:
Correctly! He doesn't need to be denied! Such a good, such a sincere person! I wouldn't say no to this!
Daughter:
Mother! Wait you! Listen, Dimochka! We just sat, he told me about his life ...
Young man:
We sat, drank ... did he pester you?
Daughter:
What are you, no! But he gave me a present! Look, the iPhone 6!
Mother:
Here is a gift! Here is a gift! This is not for you to give flowers with a piece of paper inside!
Young man:
Oh, so, it means that I accepted the gift! That's it, I've had enough!
The young man turns and leaves.
Mother:
Oh my daughter, don't be so upset! Better tell me, did the boss pester you? Ah, tell me!
Doorbell.
Daughter:
Dima, my Dima is back!
She runs to the door, opens it, and her boss is standing on the threshold with a large bouquet of flowers.
Daughter:
Victor Pavlovich? How are you here? What are you doing here?
Boss:
Veronica! Let me come in and confess to you!
Mother:
Of course, of course, come in and confess!
Boss:
When we were sitting and having dinner, I was the happiest person in the world. And when you left, and I was left alone, I was horrified! After all, I can stay alone all my life! Where will I put my money then? To whom did I build a cottage, a house then? Who do I buy cars and jewelry for?
Mother:
Yes, yes, for whom?
Daughter:
Mom, wait! Victor Pavlovich! You will still find your happiness, you will still meet your love.
Boss:
Veronica, it seems to me that I have already found my destiny and my love. And you know. I want to tell you that this is...
Mother:
Who? Who? Tell?
Boss:
This... this... this...
The door opens with a bang and a young man enters. He is already very drunk and somehow stands on his feet.
Young man:
Veronica! My love! My girl is good! I understood everything, I understood everything ... (here he sees the boss with a bouquet of flowers). Now I understand everything!
Daughter:
Dima, you misunderstood everything. It's just that Viktor Pavlovich came to say that he had found his love. And now I wanted to say who it is.
Mother:
Yes, tell me already, who is it?
The young man takes out a gun, points it at the boss and says:
Yes, it's very interesting to know, tell me who it is?
Boss (frightened):
Look, can you put this thing away? After all, she can shoot!
Young man (jerking the shutter of a pistol):
Whether he shoots or not depends on what name you call!
Boss:
Well, that's it... like I said, I met my love... and her name is...
Her name is...her name is...
Boss:
Anastasia Ivanovna! (and mom gives flowers)
Mom (surprised):
What? I? You really surprised me! I don't even know what to say!
Young man:
I feel like this is just a gimmick! I don't believe you!
Boss:
Yes, I'm telling the truth! I just wanted to get closer to her through her daughter, to break the ground, so to speak! Well, you know what they say - if you want to get the trust of a cow, caress the calf!
Young man:
Kiss!
Boss:
What?
Young man:
Just kiss! Do you love her? Then kiss!
Boss:
You know, I was brought up in such a way that I can’t afford to touch a woman at the first meeting ...
Then mom throws the bouquet aside, goes up to the boss, grabs him by the ass and hugs and kisses him tightly.
Young man:
Now, I believe! Well, Veronica, let's go to the cinema. Let's not spoil the holiday in love!
The young man and daughter leave.
Boss:
Wait! Let's go to the cinema with you! I just love this movie!
Mother:
I'll show you a movie for adults now, you'll rock!
Curtain.
Leading:
Dear friends! As you understand, love is such a feeling that you can not buy for any money and for any gifts! Happy holiday, lovers! And take care of your love!
Key tags.
(After a short ring, the door opens. A middle-aged woman is standing, dressed modestly, in a long skirt. Her brochures and books are in her hands. She quietly repeats the memorized text under her breath)
Woman: Hello, tell me, do you believe in God? If you have difficulties in life, you do not know who to turn to ...
(In parallel, her head slowly rises. The woman screams and faints. A demon stands on the threshold with horns and a trident in his hands. Loud music comes from the apartment, a guy in an angel costume runs out)
Angel: Listen, of course, I understand everything, we have Halloween, but come on, you won’t open the door anymore, otherwise the third faint in the evening is too ...
Fill us, please, but more expensive, at least every day!
(A knock on the door, a man stands on the threshold, an alcoholic opens it)
Neighbor: Listen, you flood us!
Alcoholic: (hiccups) How long?
Neighbor: Of course, for a long time.
Alcoholic: Why didn't you come earlier?
Neighbor: Because before, high-quality whiskey ran from my ceiling, and now only cheap port wine! Do something about it.
An experienced massage therapist does not care who comes to the procedures
A knock on the door opens a healthy middle-aged man. On the threshold of a woman in a tight dress with bright makeup, exposes her leg.
Woman: Well, honey, I'm here for you.
Man: Of course, I understand that there would be a lot of work for me here, but you are unlikely to come to me.
Woman: What, am I not suitable?
Man: No, what are you, your brisket is even fine, legs and hips too, though the sirloin let us down, but that's okay. The massage therapist doesn't care. His door is nearby, you are mistaken.
Woman: Who are you then?
Man: I'm a butcher, ma'am.
If Stalin had the Internet in ancient times
(A guy with a laptop bursts into Stalin's office, puts it busily on the table)
Stalin: What is this?
Guy: Internet
Stalin: And what is he to me?
Guy: How's that for what? Here everything is written about everyone.
Stalin: Come on, tell me, when will the war end?
Guy: (driving in a request) May 9th next year.
Stalin: Hmm, a good date, spring, I must write it down. And what about nuclear developments?
Guy: Wikipedia says that the development of the first atomic bomb ended only in 1949.
Stalin: Okay, not long to wait. Well, is there anything about me?
Guy: Of course there is, Comrade Stalin! It is written: Iosif Vissarionovich was a state leader until his death in 1953 ...
Stalin: Whatoooo? What kind of death? Shoot!
Guy: But why me? That's what it says on the Internet.
Stalin: Who is in charge?
Guy: But there is no main thing, everything is on its own.
Stalin: Guards, exile him to the Urals, no computers and the Internet!
(The guy is taken away)
Stalin: Look, what young people have gone. By themselves, they have everything. Now I will write to Lavrenty Pavlovich, let him shoot hackers, we will stop the production of computers, and let him direct all his efforts to nuclear development.
Stalin always keeps his word and is ready for decisive action.
(Stalin is sitting at a table with his entourage, only 6 people. He takes out a chess piece from his bosom)
Stalin: You all know that the situation in our country is not simple. Therefore, I decided to choose a successor among you, in case of emergency. The one who takes this figurine, and becomes him.
(She throws chess on the table, those close to her rush to her, except for one. After grunts and confusion, the winner gets up with a piece held high.)
Stalin: Oh, well done! Send everyone to Siberia in exile, and you will be their leader. Stalin always keeps his word. And you (pointing to the one who remained seated) will be shot. For inactivity! Security, take everyone away!
The best funny scenes for a fun company
We read the classics and become a fatal seductress
(A modestly dressed woman, clearly educated and intelligent, addresses a consultant in a bookstore)
Woman: Tell me, please, do you have anything… well… how can I say something… well, something on such topics, you know… very intimate and frank… advice in general?
Seller: Of course there is, here you have "The best sex lessons: how to become a seductress."
Woman: I just have a daughter, she is dating a boy. And they seem to read the classics, but don't misunderstand me, because I'm a mother, I'm worried.
Saleswoman: You would immediately say so, here, hold on!
(Pulls out the volume “War and Peace”. The woman starts leafing through the book, and among the pages we see packages of condoms. The woman looks at the saleswoman with wide eyes, and she winks at her and nods)
What do the young and old buy in the bookstore?
(Scene in the bookstore. Culinary department)
Salesperson: Hello, how can I help you?
Buyer: Good afternoon. I'm looking for a book, it's called "On Tasty and Healthy Food."
Seller: You know, it is sold in two volumes. What do you need?
Buyer: Is there a fundamental difference?
Salesperson: Well, of course. The first volume is more often read by young people, it is called “On Tasty Food”, but the elderly are interested in the second, it is called “On Healthy Food”.
Who will go to work and do business?
(Store scene cell phones. The seller demonstrates the latest phone models to the buyer)
Seller: Look, this model is very comfortable. This phone broadcasts everything you see directly to the Internet.
Customer: What, and even from the bathroom?
Salesperson: Well, of course! Very cool, isn't it? But this model is suitable for those who love to put likes. It has a keyboard that you can always carry with you and a projector to see everything on any surface.
Buyer: Well, yes, and its price is appropriate, like a car ...
Seller: Well, if this price does not suit you, I can offer a stunning model! There is everything, even a folding knife, a bill acceptor, a folding tent and a survival kit.
Buyer: And how to make calls from it?
Seller: Why do you need to call from him? This feature has been removed as unnecessary.
Customer: No, this doesn't suit me at all, goodbye.
Salesperson: No, wait! Most the best option for you from the popular pear company! This phone can do everything, even go to work for you!
Dad can do anything and more
(A young guy comes to the pharmacy where his father works)
Guy: Dad, hello, today the guys and I are going to the cottage.
Dad: Ha ha, yes, yes, son, I understand, do you need something with you?
Guy: Well, yes, you remember what happened last time ... Come on, now there’s enough for everyone, otherwise the girls will start squeaking that they’ve been broken off the whole buzz, and the guys won’t like this alignment either.
Dad: Olesya! Get the biggest pack of condoms from the warehouse. (The queue is watching intently.) And bring a couple of vials of iodine with brilliant green.
Boy: Do you think that's enough?
Dad: This time there will definitely be enough balloons for everyone, go inflate and color!
What are the old women in the queues now
(A scene in a pharmacy. A huge line, a scrawny old woman comes up behind, examines all the people, tries to squeeze through, but they don’t let her in. Then she calmly takes out a hat-mask, puts it on, then a gun appears from her purse)
Old lady: Everybody on the floor, don't move! This is a robbery!
(The queue falls to the floor with a squeal, the old woman takes off her mask and confidently approaches the cashier)
Old woman: Corvalol, please, a couple of vials for me, and two packs of validol. Look, what kind of people went, you can't survive without a gun!
Entertain guests with original scenes
Try these funny and short children's sketches for 2 people.
Robbers can also make mistakes and mix up apartments
(The room is dark, suddenly two robbers appear, lighting their way with flashlights, talking in a whisper)
First: It seems to be correct. The apartment is good, there is something to profit from.
Second: Well, yes, gold, dishes, there is a chandelier ... like in my house. The owner is clearly wealthy.
First: Look, the plasma is huge! Always wanted one like this!
Second: Come on, throw this plasma, they cost a penny now, but they work every other time, I have the same one at home.
(Comes up, presses buttons, nothing happens)
Vaughn and he also does not plow. Let's find the safe.
First: Already found. The castle is complex, I have never seen such, we will mess around for a long time.
Second: Long...long... Give it here. (He confidently dials the code, the safe opens)
First: Look, how clever you are with him, have you already met such people?
Second: (Sighs) Turn on the light, come on.
First: Why?
Second: This is my safe. Turn it on, I say.
The first robber turns on the light and spreads his arms.
How to quickly get to the doctor
(The wife and husband make their way to the dentist's office. The husband has a swollen cheek bandaged. He mumbles and whines languidly)
Husband: Well, look at the line here, we definitely won’t get in today, let’s better go tomorrow.
Wife: Yes, wait, stop whining, now I'll do everything.
Husband: Well, maybe not, I can tolerate it. It already hurts less, really, look.
Wife: I said that today means today. Wait.
(She pushes everyone and breaks into the office, her voice is heard from there)
Wife: What are you doing? Who even taught you? The instruments are completely blunt, they are not disinfected, the assistant generally sleeps!
( Heart-rending female cries are heard, the line to the office is slowly thinning, the husband sits white-faced, the wife leaves the office and addresses her husband in a hoarse voice)
Wife: Well, you see, I told you that you will go to the doctor today. Come on, come on in. And I'll break through to the otolaryngologist, otherwise I lost my voice.
When can hypnosis be useful in family life?
Option one:
(A woman enters the psychologist's office)
Woman: Hello. Last week my husband and I had a hypnosis session with you, remember? You also inspired him that he is a dog. So, this is still going on, can you help us?
Psychologist: I understand, bring him here, we will return him to the image of a man.
Woman: No, you know, I'm generally happy with everything. The house is quiet, he is affectionate, plays with me, kisses me all the time, does not drink, does not watch football, is not even going to go fishing.
Woman: Make sure he stops dragging fleas off the street!
Option two:
(A man enters the psychologist's office)
Man: Hello. Last week my wife and I had a hypnosis session with you. You inspired her that she is a cat, and this continues to this day. Can you help us please?
Psychologist: I understand, bring your wife here, we will return her human form.
Man: No, you know, in general, everything suits me. No screams, tantrums, I can safely drink beer with friends, even let me go fishing.
Psychologist: So what's the problem then?
Man: Make her stop licking! And these hairballs are just an abomination!
Sometimes it is difficult to distinguish the patient from the psychiatrist
(The patient comes to see a psychiatrist)
Patient: Doctor, I have a split personality.
Doctor: And who are they?
Patient: One is me and the other is you.
Doctor: And what, both exist?
Patient: Well, of course!
Doctor: Well, you must be sick. And what does the second person tell you?
Patient: That I'm sick and that you don't exist.
Doctor: How can I not exist if this is me?
Patient: But according to your logic, one of us should not be.
Doctor: Can you see me?
Patient: Yes.
Doctor: I see you. Yes, there is something wrong with me...
Patient: And then give me a certificate that I am healthy.
Doctor: Yes, of course. And come see me tomorrow. Both.
The perfect girl will be your best friend
(The scene in the therapist's office, the patient enters with a rubber deflated doll under his arm)
Patient: Hello doctor, my girlfriend and I are having problems.
Doctor: Where is your girlfriend?
Patient: There she is. Before, everything was great, but now she is kind of sad, drooping, lost her shape. I don't know what to do. First I was referred to a psychiatrist. But for some reason they tried to treat me, not her. And everything is fine with me. Help us please.
Doctor: But you understand that your girlfriend is rubber? And I treat people, living people, you understand?
Patient: And why is it worse?! Beautiful, well-groomed, modest and quiet. He agrees with everything, never drips on his brains, puts on what I want, paints as I like. She doesn't drink, doesn't smoke, and has no friends. Doesn't change. Allows me to drink beer and watch football.
(The doctor takes the doll, inflates it, returns it to the nervous patient)
Doll: Thank you. Honey, let's go to bed!
Patient: Thank you very much, I knew you would help us!
Doctor: Eh, people are lucky. And I was a fool, got married, a fool and remained.
Funny short scenes - fun ideas
4.9 (98.18%) 11 votesEvery girl loves dates - this is an ironclad rule, and there are no exceptions to it. That is why learning to organize meetings with her is the same as mastering the backhand in tennis - victory will always be yours. Do not think that we doubt your abilities, but we will still give a small cheat sheet.
Meeting place can not be Changed
The opinion that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach is actually more applicable to women - a date in a restaurant is rightly recognized as a classic of the genre. Bet on a quiet place with live music and good food (the more interesting the menu, the better). If you want to surprise her, don't tell her where you're going, but take her/take her away in an unknown direction, promising a wonderful evening. Do not skimp on her favorite foods and drinks - remember, gratitude is just around the corner. During dinner, give a couple of compliments and, as if inadvertently, touch her hand - this turns girls on more than kisses on the neck.
The best gift is flowers
A modest but exquisite bouquet will say more than any words about your attentive attitude towards her. Just don't give red roses at the first meeting. It may seem strange to you, but some girls really pay a lot of attention to the meaning of flowers, and most of them associate scarlet roses with love - why give her vain hopes or reveal your feelings right away? Besides, red roses are trite.
For reference: now at the peak of fashion are white or pale pink peonies with large round buds. She will want to immediately post a photo of such flowers on her Instagram, and this, believe our experience, is direct evidence right choice. Do not give too large a bouquet - no one wants to carry "weights" with them. An arrangement of five to seven flowers will be just right. Exotic flowers of bizarre shapes on long stems present you as a great original and obviously not a boring person. But here it is important not to overdo it. If the flower comes from distant Africa, then let it be alone.
Follow the dress code
Deciding on the wardrobe, make a choice in favor of elegant and at the same time casual clothes. In other words, a three-piece suit is best left in the closet (otherwise she will be nervous all evening that she didn’t wear a floor-length dress), but a stylish polo shirt is fine. First, it's beautiful. And secondly, thanks to the short sleeves, she will be able to see your biceps. After all, do you have them? An unobtrusive perfume will be an appropriate addition to the image. For example, the new EAU DE LACOSTE L.12.12 Magnetic Pour Lui with a refreshing note of mountain juniper. Violet gives the fragrance an unusual note that will delight your companion. But, most importantly, this fragrance is suitable for both rendezvous and workdays.
To be continued
After the restaurant, there are two options for the development of events: either you go to your place, or you beautifully accompany her to the entrance and say goodbye with a short kiss. If the date is the first, it is better not to invite her to your place and, moreover, do not insist on continuing. Yes, as much as you would like. Yes, even if she definitely doesn't mind. Be smarter - girls love "not like everyone else" and appreciate when a man conquers them. Imagine how much you'll be waiting for alone time in 3-4 more meetings.
The scenario was developed for holding a holiday on February 14 for high school students. Teenagers will like such an event, because on this day you can express feelings in a playful way to that person who was afraid to confess on a normal day.
During this period of time, the relationship between the sexes is already interesting for schoolchildren, and they learn to love. It is important to inculcate a careful attitude to such feelings. For such tasks, they create funny and cool scenarios for schoolchildren, which allow them to attract their attention and teach them to treat their own and other people's spiritual impulses correctly. Such events make it possible to expand the range of interests of students, introduce them to the origin of the holiday and the traditions of other peoples, develop the emotional component of the personality of a teenager, and develop a friendly attitude of students towards each other.
Presenter 1: Good afternoon, our beloved, lovers and those who want to fall in love.
Host 2: We are happy to see you at the celebration of Valentine's Day.
Presenter 1: For 17 centuries, lovers all over the world have been celebrating the most romantic holiday of the year: Valentine's Day, also called Valentine's Day.
Host 2: Today even the air is filled with love, filled with warm feelings and dreams. And Cupids are in a hurry to unite couples whose feelings have been tested by time. They help unite the halves that are lost among the hustle and bustle of life.
Presenter 1: And how did it all start?
Host 2: From the fact that once the Roman emperor forbade his soldiers to marry, believing that this way they would go into battle more boldly. But the simple priest Valentine was not afraid of the wrath of the emperor and secretly joined the knot of lovers.
Presenter 1: But, unfortunately, it was on February 14 that he was executed for this and did not have time to confess his feelings to his beloved. She was left with only a note that he managed to write before the execution. Since then, these notes are called "valentines".
Host 2: Since then, lovers all over the world congratulate each other on this day and try to talk about their feelings.
Presenter 1: We hasten to congratulate all those present on the delightful day of love and present a musical gift from a school student.
A high school student sings a love song.
Scene Date
A boy and a girl enter the stage.
Young woman: It's already 9 o'clock, we are near the house. It's late, I'm in a hurry. Maybe we...
Guy(aside): If I kiss, we will have to meet. Instead of a kiss, her father, a military commissar, will take her to the army. What to do: kiss or run away?
Young woman(aside): If he doesn't kiss me now, I'll knock him out.
Guy(aside): If I don't kiss her now, she'll knock me out. I wonder what she's thinking now?
Guy(looking into the girl's eyes): Your eyes are so beautiful! ( kisses).
Young woman: Oh, so we're dating now, or what? Don't worry, I'll be waiting for you from the army, writing letters.
Guy: So you said you'd help.
Young woman: Dad will help you. It will help you become a real man. Fell. Wringed out.
End of scene.
Presenter 1: Love is an uplifting feeling. Anything strong feeling displayed in this word. And this is completely natural, because it is love that gives a person strength.
Host 2: On February 14, French people usually give away chocolate puddings, strawberry yogurts, romantic trips, heart-cut ham and lucky lottery tickets.
Presenter 1: In Italy, Valentine's Day is called "sweet day", and the main gifts are heart-shaped chocolates, sweets and marmalade.
Host 2: The example of the Italians was borrowed in the USA. For a long time, Americans presented marzipans to each other, and it was a worthy gift, because marzipan consists of sugar, which at that time cost a lot.
Presenter 1: Undoubtedly, therefore, in melodious Italy, gentlemen perform a serenade for ladies dear to their hearts. Meet! Our Cavaliers!
A team of guys comes on stage and sings a song about love.
Presenter 1: What do you think love is?
Host 2: It can be a blessing, and for some it can be a punishment. I even think sometimes that perhaps it would be easier to live without her.
Presenter 1: In any case, love is a gift to value a person's happiness above your own.
Host 2: Yes, love is a delightful feeling that performs miracles, making a person powerful, kind, generous. Only the feeling of falling in love makes the heart glow with determination, blossom into a delightful inflorescence, compose magnificent poems.
Together: Let love rule the world!
The student performs a poem about love.
Presenter 1: Do you know how mutual love ends?
Host 2: Perhaps a wedding? But no, it never ends.
Presenter 1: But what to do if you can not reciprocate?
Host 2: Most importantly, always tell the truth, because it is very easy to hurt another person.
Presenter 1: Sophia Loren said "A woman who does not love the shortcomings of a man does not love him." But what to do if there are too many shortcomings?
Scene "Marry me"
Scenery: the outskirts of the village, a house in flowers. On the threshold stands a girl in a kokoshnik and an embroidered sundress. A guy comes in a shirt and with a balalaika.
Ivan: Hi Mana!
Manya: Hi Ivan!
Ivan: But daddy says that you will marry me.
Manya: Marry you? Yes, for any money!
Ivan: Lie, lie, Marusya! Maybe you won’t get out for little money, but you’ll get out for big money at a run.
Manya: Oh yes, you! What am I to do with you?
Ivan: But my mother said that you embroidered a shirt for me.
Manya: Do you want a shirt? Yep, now! You will have a shirt!
Manya: Oh, that would be right away! In the meantime, Manka will bring an embroidered shirt, I will sit down, rest and eat deliciously. I love passion as it is. I would sit and eat, sleep and eat, walk and eat. But dad says that my stomach is very big, but I don’t listen to him.
Ivan sits down to eat, and then falls asleep. He dreams that he is a Turkish sultan and has the right to choose beautiful ladies for his harem. Ivan changes into a sultan's robe and turban and goes to bed on the stage.
To the music "I Wanna Be Loved by You, a guy dressed as Marilyn Monroe enters the stage and kicks Ivan. Ivan gets up.
Monroe:
Hi, hello, how are you?
I'm coming from America.
I read on the internet
What the Sultan needs a lady.
I have a villa on the sea
I am smart, slim, beautiful.
John's heart will burn
Like a fire at McDonald's.
Eyes light up like this
Like Uncle McDuck.
Ivan:
Here comes the lady! To love
He just wants to burn.
No, I will not marry her.
The rest I'll take a look at.
Monroe leaves, Ivan goes to bed. A German woman comes out to German folk music. It is advisable to pick up a large girl or also dress up a guy. The German woman behaves rudely and not feminine.
German:
Achtung to everyone and Guten Tag!
My sultan, my bachelor.
I came here
To stay forever.
Oh my dear, my vizier,
You will be the commander at home.
We will be close to you
Like cabbage and sausages.
Ivan:
No no! This is not a girl, this is some kind of Fuhrer-mistress!
No, I will not marry her.
The rest I'll take a look at.
Goes back to sleep. To the song "Besame mucho" a Mexican woman enters in a long dress with a fan in her hands. All the time fussing and can not stand still.
Mexican:
Buenos dias, my amigo!
Let's dance the tango with you.
I'm on fire like a chili pepper.
I want to be loved.
Will you look like a sombrero
On a bull, no, on a bullfighter.
I'm good not only in appearance,
I will create a bullfight out of life.
Ivan:
Well, no, you're kind of fast, nimble. I won't be able to catch up with you to kiss you.
No, I will not marry her.
The rest I'll take a look at.
The Mexican woman leaves, the French woman enters to the music of Mireille Mathieu"Pardone moi" (you can also disguise a young man). Clothing: high heels, hat, strict dress. Kicks the sleeping Ivan.
Frenchwoman:
Bonjour, monsieur, bonjour, madam!
My dear cavalier
If I say "merci"
Everything will be whatever you ask.
And if you say "I love you"
I will burn France for you.
Ivan:
No, instead of loving
Am I going to extinguish France?
No, I will not marry her.
The rest I'll take a look at.
Lies down again. Finally, under the folk song "Russian nesting dolls", Manya enters with an embroidered shirt.
Manya:
I am a Russian girl
I'm kind of nice.
kind, cheerful,
Temper - from the people!
I can love heartily
I will be faithful forever
I will respect my husband
And give birth to children.
Ivan:
Oh, not a girl, but gold!
Lips like raspberries
The eyes are two stars.
There will be life - a picture
No problem at all!
At this moment, Ivan wakes up, but there is no harem, no beauties. And instead of a shirt, Mani has a pumpkin in her hands.
Manya: Here, Ivan, this is for you.
Ivan: And what is it?
Manya: So this is a pumpkin, juicy, fragrant.
Ivan: Why is she to me?
Manya: You cook your own porridge.
Ivan: What?
Manya: What-what. Pumpkin. Don't you know how delicious this porridge is? And you don’t have to go to the market, and you don’t have to spend money. Just like you love.
Ivan: Ah, okay. I'll go and ask my mother to cook for me.
Manya: That's how I taught Ivan a lesson. Let him finally understand that what is more important in love is not money at all, but feelings.
Competition program "Valentin and Valentina"
Host 2: Mine Reed said beautiful words: “Love tames proud hearts, teaches haughty condescension, but its main quality is to elevate and ennoble everything.”
Presenter 1: Do you know that this holiday is not celebrated at the same time in different parts of the world? In Spain, for example, on May 1st. And its main attributes are the "Maypole" and the beauty queen, chosen from the most seductive representatives of the fair sex.
Host 2: That is why we will now hold a competition to determine the honorary titles "Valentin and Valentine of the Year."
High school students take part in the competition. The choice of participants is made in the form of a lottery. Notes with the names of students are put in two bags. In one bag are the names of the girls, in the other - the guys. An independent person pulls out leaflets with participants one by one from the bags. The competition requires 5 girls and 5 guys. Participants take the stage.
Presenter 1: And now, to form pairs, we will randomly distribute letters and numbers to our participants. I will call combinations of letters and numbers, and in this way we will create pairs.
Host 2: What do you think girls appreciate most in guys? Of course, mind. Therefore, we will hold an intellectual competition for guys. Each correct answer is a point for your couple.
- Which hand is best for stirring sugar in a cup of tea? (More conveniently with a spoon).
- How many mice does an owl eat per day? (Not at all, she sleeps during the day).
- What month of the year do people talk the least? (In February, it is the shortest).
- Which wheel does not spin while the car is moving? (Spare).
- What can be cooked but not eaten? (Lessons).
- What happens when a yellow towel is dipped into the Red Sea? (The towel will become wet.)
- What can't be eaten for breakfast? (Lunch and dinner).
- How many sandwiches can you eat on an empty stomach? (Only one: after the first it will no longer be on an empty stomach).
- When a new house is built, what is the first nail driven into? (Actually, a hat.)
Presenter 1: And what do guys appreciate in girls? Well, economics, of course. After all, you are future mothers and keepers of the family hearth. And, of course, you must understand cooking. Let's test your knowledge in this matter. You have to say what it is. For example, an apple is a fruit, a chicken is a bird. Shall we start?
- feijoa (berry);
- carambola (fruit);
- hazelnut (nut);
- feta (cheese);
- parsnip (vegetable);
- churchkhela (sweets);
- chum salmon (fish);
- pu-erh (tea).
Host 2: And now the competition "Best Artist". It is necessary for three minutes with the help of only hearts for each pair to draw Valentine. The couple chosen by the audience will win.
Presenter 1: And let's guys invite girls on a date. We will determine the place of the meeting by drawing lots. But you suddenly lost the gift of speech, explain to the girl with gestures where you are inviting her.
Places for a date: amusement park, cinema, museum, circus, cafe.
Host 2: Well, after so many competitions, I would like to know how well you got to know each other.
Place the students with their backs to each other and ask questions about appearance game partner. The pair with the most correct answers wins.
The number of points is calculated, the winners of the competitive program are determined.
Presenter 1: Dear Valentin and Valentina, remember that your task is to bring love to the world, reconcile friends, and inspire noble deeds. And this can only be done by your own example. Be always cheerful, kind and honest. Do justice. And then the world around you will become better and cleaner. Happy holiday, dear friends!